As I looked at the events unfolding, and the favor we had in every direction, I began to get more and more encouraged. It was surreal as to how every time something would go against us - it would fix itself miraculously. No matter what we walked through, I knew God was behind this because only He can create such favor when none is either deserved or expected by any means.
Each day consisted of much time spent on the phone and talking with people who stopped by. We continued working to fix our home, and our friend Jill, offered to sell it for us making no commission for herself. It was amazing how people came to help from all sides. Our neighbors were being so supportive and I even learned about their family's issues with immigration from France and South Africa. Dan's friends from his old job came to interview us and create a video of us as well, and many wonderful friends from church came to support us and watch the news story with us and be interviewed. The Tortorici family, Rita, Roberta, Sherry and the Met Church bunch were incredible! My sister's friends Mike and Sarah and their family, Jessica, Victoria, Jewelz,The Tirado's, and many more offered so much help with the house, buying supplies, garage sales, etc. it was awesome to experience. And of course the Reeds who offered their continual support and prayers and kept me sane - Thank you to the moon and back Lissa! We love you all! Our friends from Mannatech also began calling everyone they knew in the political sects and getting the word around on social networks and e-mail. Joe-Green and Ray constantly looked for ways to help and Terri was amazing! Kim - my sister in -law, worked tirelessly on our behalf contacting even her cousin in England who was an Episcopalian bishop or something! I will never forget it.
The Global team at Gateway were the first ones to take me aside and pray with me! Pastor Geoffrey had his own story with his wife when they both won the green card lottery to come here from South Africa and he prayed with me first. Carina - my absolute favorite girl at Gateway - was incredibly sweet and supportive, offering prayers and advice on anything I needed. Pastor Troy, Lorena, Jessica and the rest of the team came together for me like nobody's business, praying for me and supporting me and I will always cherish you all! I will never forget Pastor Bob on the Freedom Team telling me that even if the authorities do not want us here, and if we are not wanted as per the system, he said "we do, we want you here." It meant a lot. It did.
My in-laws were amazing though all of this. From the first day I told them, they were amazingly supportive, writing letters on our behalf, calling political officials, and involving their church. The little Catholic church in their small town was filled with wonderful people who prayed for us daily and offered support. Also, Dan's cousins and extended family stepped in as well - helping with lawyers all the way in New York, Vermont, Massachusetts, and down to Florida - contacting officials and TV crews, and much more. It was the big family I always wanted, coming together to help!
I remember friends contacting local political offices so much that Kay Granger's office assistant said they have never had this many phone calls about one case! Michael Burgess who was the congressman for my sisters district at the time offered a lot of help too. I remember a town hall meeting one Saturday morning. About fifty of our friends and family showed up to support us, as we were going to ask questions about the immigration policy. The news crews also showed up to take note of the event. Jelena's husband, Steve stood up and asked some questions on our behalf and Mr. Burgess answered accordingly, and favorably, but as we suspected clear answers like "for" and "against" are taboo words in the government. Afterward, we had more interviews with the news teams and a private meeting with Congressman Burgess and his team. He was very professional and helpful and worked on our behalf to get us a private interview with the head ICE officials.
Our friends continued to phone politicians, and a few that stand out I would like to mention here: Senator John Cornyn, Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison, Senator Kirk Watson, Congressman Pete Sessions, and others - if anyone remembers please let me know. Even Rick Perry Glen Beck, Bill O'Reilley MSNBC, FOX NEWS and various talk shows were contacted.
Even friends on their own, like an amazing gentleman Mark Mangrum, who helped us so much in so many ways, like hiring a landscape company to help with our yard situation. The lady who owned the company came by and during her many visits I had a chance to minister to her about some messy situations at home and pray with her for her kids. It was ordained and I knew it. Mark also helped in writing an independent article http://www.texasgopvote.com/blog/current-immigration-system-obsolete-06271.
One day, a friend of mine asked if we would meet with her friend who worked on documentaries on PBS to relate our story as she was interested in doing a film on us. Jelena and I met Jodi in Waco one afternoon at a Starbucks and talked like women on fire about some great passions of ours like human trafficking. She told us stories that would make your skin crawl, and all of a sudden our meager immigration stick we were in, seemed so small. We told her our story, but more importantly we made a new friend. Jodi is such an inspirational woman with great talents and vision. Shortly after, Jodi introduced us to another wonderful lady, Sarah, a bright and charming professor at Baylor who is also involved in the film industry. We met with the ladies many times, and it seemed that we have known them forever. Although nothing ever came out of the documentary or movie, it was a fun notion, and we enjoyed spending time with our new friends.
People were contacting all kinds of groups and it seemed that all religious denominational separations were put on hold nor did it matter about one being a democrat, republican or any other political sect. All of the differences were dropped and people came together for us from all walks of life. It was certainly the LORD's doing because it was too perfect and timely to be anything else. I remember how people came together to pray on our behalf and anytime we had a favorable response we posted on Facebook people responded giving glory to God. I knew in my deepest being that the peace I had was from God. I had wisdom about each situation and special knowledge and discernment about things happening as well. So, knowing all this was His well orchestrated plan, I knew all was being worked out for our good. The truth I kept going back to was that No-one, no authority, no government official or agency, no law or person had any authority over me that was not given to him by God, and if He gave anyone the authority to deport or detain or even have us go through this ordeal - then He had a good reason behind it and it was planned for our good. It sure was. I see now that the cries of His kids came to the top of His head (I dunno but my mom used to use this terminology) and it was time - but then He always knew it would be.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
News Flash!
As I write about this time now, I so wish that I had done this while all this was going on. Like kept journal or even blogged on here on a daily basis! UGH! But oh well. I know I was scatterbrained and sitting down to collect my thoughts and write was not in my plans then. Anyway, the first few days were filled with friends and family contacting us and bringing us food, helping in the house, helping with the kids, and taking them places. I am so thankful for the many wonderful friends, I cannot express.
We called the news media this time as our lawyer suggested, and Lari from FOX news, Casey from Channel 8, and even the CBS Channel 11 team came by our home to interview us. (please someone remind me of the wonderful reporter who helped us as I lost her card and cannot remember her name). They were all so very nice and helpful, I was amazed. We even got an interview for the Dallas Morning News paper, and metro columnist, Jacquielynn Floyd did a very compelling story on us as well. The funny thing about this was that I was contacted via Facebook by a Serbian reporter who wanted to use the story he had read in the Dallas paper in Serbia. I said okay and gave him some more information as well, and he wrote a very nice story about us in Serbia also! It was amazing.
The only thing was, even though Lari had warned me about paying no attention to comments, I started reading the comments anyway, from people who wrote under the articles about us online. There was a lot of hate from people saying we should go home and be deported, but there was a lot of nice caring comments as well. The one that got me the most was under the Serbian article. When the picture was taken at my sister's home for the Dallas Morning News, the photographer said to look sternly into the camera and not to smile, and so we listened and did as we were asked. In this picture, I look very much Middle Eastern, and apparently the Serbian readers did not want me to come back to Serbia either! I was floored. The comments were derogatory and again - telling me to stay here in the States and not be let back into Serbia, because I was "cigani." (I think a racial slur for Gypsies from Romania, Turkey, India, etc.). More reason for rejection, but by now, I was done with that. Now I remember my mom warning me to never let go of her hand when we were walking through town when I was younger because I was darker complected and could be easily mistaken for a Gypsy and if kidnapped by them, no one would suspect a thing. Childhood memories... really.
Anyway, We tried to stay clear of reading comments after that and concentrated on listening to the media personnel. The FOX team was incredible, even having us in the studio and on evening prime time at the station to get our story out. Everyone was eager to help and I began to understand how much I loved America and the people. The hatred and bitterness I had was not geared towards people but enemies I could not see. I also saw that computer glitches, paperwork mishandling, improper training and all of that played a big part as well. During this time, our lawyer kept trying to get a hold of the chief council in San Antonio who dismissed our case and denied us. We were all hoping he would see the news or he would get word about it!
I had my ankle monitor on still, which I was told I needed to keep on me until I was deported. It was somewhat of a large computer plug with a box attached to it, that whenever my light began to blink yellow, I had to find a plug nearby and plug in to recharge. In the video clips available on the Facebook page you can see what it looked like.http://www.facebook.com/groups/164355385075/ I had to keep it on green and not let it get to red or it would alert the authorities. Here's a funny story:
A few days later, we were contacted by my friend's boyfriend Joe, who worked for a news station in Austin, where we grew up, that wanted to do our story. As time was critical and we needed to get as much publicity in hopes it would reach the decision makers who would reverse our case, we jumped at any opportunity that presented itself. Austin is closer to San Antonio so - yes please! We prayed only the beneficial requests would actually make it through to us, and this is exactly the way it was. So we packed up to drive to Austin, and if I remember right, I okay-ed it with the surveillance representative in charge of me - but if not - I did not think much of it because I was told I could not leave the state. Anyway, I can't remember, but I know we would not have gone if I had any belief that it would harm our case or if it was against the surveliiance rules. So we packed up to go to my mom's in Austin and midway on I35 my monitor starts beeping. I'm flipping out because we just passed some towns and there is not another gas station until Waco or something. Dan's going ninety miles an hour to get me somewhere where I can plug in, and finally pulls into a gas station that looked like a Mosque replica where we get out and I bring my charger. So, I walk in with a monitor around my ankle and a charger for it in my hand and I know I'm freaking they guy out behind the register. Dan walks in with the kids too who had to go to the restroom, so it's a whole pack of us. I go in WI-FI sitting area that's almost like a room for professionals and their electronic devices in the middle of nowhere in a gas station! A lady is there on her lap-top as we walk in and Dan helps me plug in, and the kids sit around me like it's no big deal for mom to plug in her ankle monitor at all. She looks at us, looks at my monitor, and "oh look at the time," leaves very quickly after. It was hilarious. So I get all charged up but as we're walking out, I'm still beeping, and the dude behind the register is still not happy about all of this. We get in the van, and the monitor wont stop beeping. Then the beeping gets more frequent and I think develops a new tone, so Dan flips out and turns around, as we're thinking a chopper's going to land around us anytime now and the swat team that gets out will drop us all to the ground! We start driving back and wonder if we are not suppose to go to interview in Austin after all? But I called my surveillance rep as I had her card, and she told me that the beeping occurs to alert the authorities when I have gone near an airport, train or bus station - which I didn't know - and apparently the gas station we stopped at was a truck stop/bus station! Really? So she reset my monitor and we headed back to Austin. It was neat that my oldest daughter was praying this whole time in the Spirit and prophesying to us about all kinds of stuff. One of the things she said was that our story will not get viral media attention until it is all over with. I was a bit disappointed because we were told that was our only chance, but God wanted us to rely on Him and not the media. I got it finally and it took my 13 year old to make it clear! Go figure!
Thanks to Joe who supported us and worked on our behalf, we had two interviews in Austin with Channel 8 TWC, and NBC KXAN also CW Austin, and came back to more recaps and follow up interviews in Fort Worth. We became known as the "sisters" and the support never stopped from all ends of the earth. I loved the special notes and messages that I am so upset are gone from the FB page now! I read over them every day for inspiration and encouragement. While we were in Austin we got to see our friends we grew up with which are so dear to me, because they have meant so much to Dan and I throughout the years! Sean, Amy and family, Dave, Christine, Camille, Scott, Kerry, Alicia, and Dana. The rest of the crew, most of which is scattered now, like Mel and the LA bunch, Chris and Justin in San Fran area, we kept in touch with over phone, Facebook and e-mail. It was the people during this time that helped make the cause worth fighting for.
We called the news media this time as our lawyer suggested, and Lari from FOX news, Casey from Channel 8, and even the CBS Channel 11 team came by our home to interview us. (please someone remind me of the wonderful reporter who helped us as I lost her card and cannot remember her name). They were all so very nice and helpful, I was amazed. We even got an interview for the Dallas Morning News paper, and metro columnist, Jacquielynn Floyd did a very compelling story on us as well. The funny thing about this was that I was contacted via Facebook by a Serbian reporter who wanted to use the story he had read in the Dallas paper in Serbia. I said okay and gave him some more information as well, and he wrote a very nice story about us in Serbia also! It was amazing.
The only thing was, even though Lari had warned me about paying no attention to comments, I started reading the comments anyway, from people who wrote under the articles about us online. There was a lot of hate from people saying we should go home and be deported, but there was a lot of nice caring comments as well. The one that got me the most was under the Serbian article. When the picture was taken at my sister's home for the Dallas Morning News, the photographer said to look sternly into the camera and not to smile, and so we listened and did as we were asked. In this picture, I look very much Middle Eastern, and apparently the Serbian readers did not want me to come back to Serbia either! I was floored. The comments were derogatory and again - telling me to stay here in the States and not be let back into Serbia, because I was "cigani." (I think a racial slur for Gypsies from Romania, Turkey, India, etc.). More reason for rejection, but by now, I was done with that. Now I remember my mom warning me to never let go of her hand when we were walking through town when I was younger because I was darker complected and could be easily mistaken for a Gypsy and if kidnapped by them, no one would suspect a thing. Childhood memories... really.
Anyway, We tried to stay clear of reading comments after that and concentrated on listening to the media personnel. The FOX team was incredible, even having us in the studio and on evening prime time at the station to get our story out. Everyone was eager to help and I began to understand how much I loved America and the people. The hatred and bitterness I had was not geared towards people but enemies I could not see. I also saw that computer glitches, paperwork mishandling, improper training and all of that played a big part as well. During this time, our lawyer kept trying to get a hold of the chief council in San Antonio who dismissed our case and denied us. We were all hoping he would see the news or he would get word about it!
I had my ankle monitor on still, which I was told I needed to keep on me until I was deported. It was somewhat of a large computer plug with a box attached to it, that whenever my light began to blink yellow, I had to find a plug nearby and plug in to recharge. In the video clips available on the Facebook page you can see what it looked like.http://www.facebook.com/groups/164355385075/ I had to keep it on green and not let it get to red or it would alert the authorities. Here's a funny story:
A few days later, we were contacted by my friend's boyfriend Joe, who worked for a news station in Austin, where we grew up, that wanted to do our story. As time was critical and we needed to get as much publicity in hopes it would reach the decision makers who would reverse our case, we jumped at any opportunity that presented itself. Austin is closer to San Antonio so - yes please! We prayed only the beneficial requests would actually make it through to us, and this is exactly the way it was. So we packed up to drive to Austin, and if I remember right, I okay-ed it with the surveillance representative in charge of me - but if not - I did not think much of it because I was told I could not leave the state. Anyway, I can't remember, but I know we would not have gone if I had any belief that it would harm our case or if it was against the surveliiance rules. So we packed up to go to my mom's in Austin and midway on I35 my monitor starts beeping. I'm flipping out because we just passed some towns and there is not another gas station until Waco or something. Dan's going ninety miles an hour to get me somewhere where I can plug in, and finally pulls into a gas station that looked like a Mosque replica where we get out and I bring my charger. So, I walk in with a monitor around my ankle and a charger for it in my hand and I know I'm freaking they guy out behind the register. Dan walks in with the kids too who had to go to the restroom, so it's a whole pack of us. I go in WI-FI sitting area that's almost like a room for professionals and their electronic devices in the middle of nowhere in a gas station! A lady is there on her lap-top as we walk in and Dan helps me plug in, and the kids sit around me like it's no big deal for mom to plug in her ankle monitor at all. She looks at us, looks at my monitor, and "oh look at the time," leaves very quickly after. It was hilarious. So I get all charged up but as we're walking out, I'm still beeping, and the dude behind the register is still not happy about all of this. We get in the van, and the monitor wont stop beeping. Then the beeping gets more frequent and I think develops a new tone, so Dan flips out and turns around, as we're thinking a chopper's going to land around us anytime now and the swat team that gets out will drop us all to the ground! We start driving back and wonder if we are not suppose to go to interview in Austin after all? But I called my surveillance rep as I had her card, and she told me that the beeping occurs to alert the authorities when I have gone near an airport, train or bus station - which I didn't know - and apparently the gas station we stopped at was a truck stop/bus station! Really? So she reset my monitor and we headed back to Austin. It was neat that my oldest daughter was praying this whole time in the Spirit and prophesying to us about all kinds of stuff. One of the things she said was that our story will not get viral media attention until it is all over with. I was a bit disappointed because we were told that was our only chance, but God wanted us to rely on Him and not the media. I got it finally and it took my 13 year old to make it clear! Go figure!
Thanks to Joe who supported us and worked on our behalf, we had two interviews in Austin with Channel 8 TWC, and NBC KXAN also CW Austin, and came back to more recaps and follow up interviews in Fort Worth. We became known as the "sisters" and the support never stopped from all ends of the earth. I loved the special notes and messages that I am so upset are gone from the FB page now! I read over them every day for inspiration and encouragement. While we were in Austin we got to see our friends we grew up with which are so dear to me, because they have meant so much to Dan and I throughout the years! Sean, Amy and family, Dave, Christine, Camille, Scott, Kerry, Alicia, and Dana. The rest of the crew, most of which is scattered now, like Mel and the LA bunch, Chris and Justin in San Fran area, we kept in touch with over phone, Facebook and e-mail. It was the people during this time that helped make the cause worth fighting for.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Socially Accepting the Challenge
And so it began... Dan and went inside and he immediately called my sister and Steve who came over right away. This situation included her, as when her visit to check in came up, she would be given the same information. We called our lawyer who filled us in on what we were facing and basically there is nothing he could do at this point since our case was closed. He was very upset about it and had been trying to get a hold of the officer who dismissed us to change his mind but with no success. Our lawyer, Mr. Smith, said that the only chance we have at this point is to go to the media and hope the pressure changes the mind of the counsel who is in charge because everything else is done. He cannot explain why our case was denied, and said there were no reasons for the decision, and it did not agree with the way he believes the law should work. It should not be that it works for some and not for others, but a step by step process that if you follow through and complete diligently you would get favorable results. If you do not go through the process - then you do not. Sounds too simple I guess. Afterall, my mom got her green card and she was the one who initially came to this country with us as children. We did not chose to come here nor did we understand or know anything about immigration as kids. We simply went along with our parents like children do. And now, our mom is allowed to stay, but we have to go back to a place we have not returned to in over 26 years, and would have a very hard time adjusting to. It made no sense. What was wrong with us and why were we still unwanted? Is it just a computer glitch or a simple eenie - meenie - miney -mo and we were not it?
I called the Serbian Embassy in Chicago and they too, were flabbergasted by our situation and said they would do anything to help. Nebojsa in the Consulate office assisted us whenever we needed help and we are truly grateful. The good thing was that due to the ankle monitor there was a stall about me going to Chicago in order to obtain my passport and the legal travel documents needed for deportation.
My sister's friend, Jessica asked how she could help and after we suggested the media - she ran with that idea. Fairly soon, we had numerous phonecalls to our home for possible interviews. Also, Steve updated the FB website to now include my story. He changed it from "Free Jelena," to "Keep Oli and Jelena in the US." http://www.facebook.com/groups/164355385075/ (Although this page started out differently and well over 1000 members supported us as I read we hit 1000 on June 21, 2010 Twitter page, FB changed their format and I think due to lack of updates at first, but then a change of format, the page is now labeled "group" and all the members were erased). Unlike button. My sister wrote up a wonderful post about me - one of those Steel Magnolia tearjerkers. I was touched but still in shock and disbelief. My sister-in-law, Kim called again as news was getting around her place of work - where Dan and Jelena both worked as well, for a very long time. People began calling as they saw the Facebook update and I think Dan and Steve answered most phone calls. http://twitter.com/#!/keepolijelena (and there was Twitter too :)
As the urgency was setting in, I remember going through the file cabinet and shredding everything. I had to keep busy. So apparently shredding our old bank statements and bills was a priority to me - I think I just dazed, actually. My sister kept asking what I needed since everyone is calling and asking how they can help. I knew our home was in desperate need of repair, but the only thing we had that we could sell and make money on, on which to live in Serbia. We had no savings left as I mentioned before, and were in a terrible financial shape. We owned the home for about 13 years, so we had equity in it. My reasoning was to fix it up quick and sell it for the best price possible. I knew that once I left, Dan would not take this project on, and probably short-sell it (and when I asked later, he admitted to this excatly), in order to come to Serbia quicker. This would leave us with very little cash to live on and I was worried for my family. I had to act quick and think fast. I asked my sister to let everyone know if they wanted to help, we needed help fixing the house. Immediately people from all over started coming to our house and painting, bringing supplies, food, calling to see what they could do, etc. I wish I had written a diary during this time. I wish I noted every note, e-mail, message, and visit. It was extremely overwhelming and humbling. My sister set up some spreadsheet and my best friend Melissa kept a notebook of needs and things done. It was amazing. I had no will to try but peace through it all. I remember laughing aloud to stay sane because observing my house was too surreal. Inside, I knew God would turn everything out for the best, and no matter what, it will be for my my best. I wanted to scream, yet I just went along with whatever others did and set up. I did not care what was going on; I was in a kind of a zone.
We had dinner provided for at least a week I think, and it was such a blessing seeing I was in no shape to cook or shop for food. So much thanks to Tonya and the Tortorici family, Rita, Roberta and the Met Church ladies who made some kind of care calendar and had people sign up to bring us food. I was literally living as a dead woman. All drive left me and I gave in and let it be. I was weak, but within me the peace was undeniable. It made me smile and laugh and wonder why everyone around me was so worried. Now don't get me wrong, there were certainly times when I dropped my guard and fell into the circumstances and panicked. But strangely, those times prepared me for this extreme sense of patriotism towards America I cannot explain. I felt like the first settlers and long forgotten immigrants who came here many moons ago. I was fighting for my family, for my freedom, and for a chance to be called an American. I was fighting for peace, a better life and greater opportunity for our kids. I paid a dear price and felt mistreated for many years, but then it all went away, and rejection disappeared with the support of so many friends and even people from all over the world we have never even met. I felt God gave me supporters and encourages for the fight. There was even a nice lady from Dublin, Ireland who was supporting us and several from Japan and Australia/New Zealand area! I felt empowered.
I knew I wanted our family to stay here. I wanted my children to go to school here. I wanted to play with my great-grandchildren here. I wanted us to retire here. THIS IS MY HOME! And I fought for it. In it all, I had peace that if we had to leave we would still be together and it would begin an entire new adventure for us. If I turned to "signs" for clues or guides in my life, I would not have fought because all the "signs" pointed to us moving to Serbia. Our neighbor told us of a friend with a mission field in Serbia he could hook us up with. It seemed like the same story but in reverse of us moving here back in 1985 that we "had" to re-live because it was a generational thing... I felt very adventurous and energetic in starting new and fresh because our life was so hard here and we were about to lose our home anyway. Dan and I were sooooo hungry for change. At this point any kind of change to our mundane, poor, and unproductive lives. But - there was a small part of me who saw this as a reason to fight. A part of me who saw this as an opportunity, in this land of opportunity. But as it is said, every testimony begins with a test. And we had so many tests, the eager hope of that many grand testimonies gave me a taste for victory I'll never forget.
I called the Serbian Embassy in Chicago and they too, were flabbergasted by our situation and said they would do anything to help. Nebojsa in the Consulate office assisted us whenever we needed help and we are truly grateful. The good thing was that due to the ankle monitor there was a stall about me going to Chicago in order to obtain my passport and the legal travel documents needed for deportation.
My sister's friend, Jessica asked how she could help and after we suggested the media - she ran with that idea. Fairly soon, we had numerous phonecalls to our home for possible interviews. Also, Steve updated the FB website to now include my story. He changed it from "Free Jelena," to "Keep Oli and Jelena in the US." http://www.facebook.com/groups/164355385075/ (Although this page started out differently and well over 1000 members supported us as I read we hit 1000 on June 21, 2010 Twitter page, FB changed their format and I think due to lack of updates at first, but then a change of format, the page is now labeled "group" and all the members were erased). Unlike button. My sister wrote up a wonderful post about me - one of those Steel Magnolia tearjerkers. I was touched but still in shock and disbelief. My sister-in-law, Kim called again as news was getting around her place of work - where Dan and Jelena both worked as well, for a very long time. People began calling as they saw the Facebook update and I think Dan and Steve answered most phone calls. http://twitter.com/#!/keepolijelena (and there was Twitter too :)
As the urgency was setting in, I remember going through the file cabinet and shredding everything. I had to keep busy. So apparently shredding our old bank statements and bills was a priority to me - I think I just dazed, actually. My sister kept asking what I needed since everyone is calling and asking how they can help. I knew our home was in desperate need of repair, but the only thing we had that we could sell and make money on, on which to live in Serbia. We had no savings left as I mentioned before, and were in a terrible financial shape. We owned the home for about 13 years, so we had equity in it. My reasoning was to fix it up quick and sell it for the best price possible. I knew that once I left, Dan would not take this project on, and probably short-sell it (and when I asked later, he admitted to this excatly), in order to come to Serbia quicker. This would leave us with very little cash to live on and I was worried for my family. I had to act quick and think fast. I asked my sister to let everyone know if they wanted to help, we needed help fixing the house. Immediately people from all over started coming to our house and painting, bringing supplies, food, calling to see what they could do, etc. I wish I had written a diary during this time. I wish I noted every note, e-mail, message, and visit. It was extremely overwhelming and humbling. My sister set up some spreadsheet and my best friend Melissa kept a notebook of needs and things done. It was amazing. I had no will to try but peace through it all. I remember laughing aloud to stay sane because observing my house was too surreal. Inside, I knew God would turn everything out for the best, and no matter what, it will be for my my best. I wanted to scream, yet I just went along with whatever others did and set up. I did not care what was going on; I was in a kind of a zone.
We had dinner provided for at least a week I think, and it was such a blessing seeing I was in no shape to cook or shop for food. So much thanks to Tonya and the Tortorici family, Rita, Roberta and the Met Church ladies who made some kind of care calendar and had people sign up to bring us food. I was literally living as a dead woman. All drive left me and I gave in and let it be. I was weak, but within me the peace was undeniable. It made me smile and laugh and wonder why everyone around me was so worried. Now don't get me wrong, there were certainly times when I dropped my guard and fell into the circumstances and panicked. But strangely, those times prepared me for this extreme sense of patriotism towards America I cannot explain. I felt like the first settlers and long forgotten immigrants who came here many moons ago. I was fighting for my family, for my freedom, and for a chance to be called an American. I was fighting for peace, a better life and greater opportunity for our kids. I paid a dear price and felt mistreated for many years, but then it all went away, and rejection disappeared with the support of so many friends and even people from all over the world we have never even met. I felt God gave me supporters and encourages for the fight. There was even a nice lady from Dublin, Ireland who was supporting us and several from Japan and Australia/New Zealand area! I felt empowered.
I knew I wanted our family to stay here. I wanted my children to go to school here. I wanted to play with my great-grandchildren here. I wanted us to retire here. THIS IS MY HOME! And I fought for it. In it all, I had peace that if we had to leave we would still be together and it would begin an entire new adventure for us. If I turned to "signs" for clues or guides in my life, I would not have fought because all the "signs" pointed to us moving to Serbia. Our neighbor told us of a friend with a mission field in Serbia he could hook us up with. It seemed like the same story but in reverse of us moving here back in 1985 that we "had" to re-live because it was a generational thing... I felt very adventurous and energetic in starting new and fresh because our life was so hard here and we were about to lose our home anyway. Dan and I were sooooo hungry for change. At this point any kind of change to our mundane, poor, and unproductive lives. But - there was a small part of me who saw this as a reason to fight. A part of me who saw this as an opportunity, in this land of opportunity. But as it is said, every testimony begins with a test. And we had so many tests, the eager hope of that many grand testimonies gave me a taste for victory I'll never forget.
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